On the other side of fear

Silently, or not

Silently, or not, life continues to show me how beautiful it is. I am called back to writing more and more and with more strength every day. As with so much of my whole being that has been put through fire and beyond in these recent months , my ability to write, too, is something I have become to doubt.

And stronger and stronger I know that there’s no other way more powerful and meaningful for us to learn what we are made of, than that of being faced with realities which scream more of what we are not.

You are not capable.

You are not loving.

You can’t.

You doubt.

You don’t believe.

You are in pain.

You’ll always be in pain.

There are truths that one way or another, must surface. There are truths that will always win. These are some of the truths I still feel, despite of the fact that I stumble when I speak, that it hurts when I walk, that it pains when I see the sun outside my window – as I do not have the strength, or so it feels, to let myself be bathed in its warmth at dawns.

What we truly believe in, shall never deceit us, shall never leave us, shall never be lost.

Pain can be embraced and hold dearly, by the immense strength of your bodies.

At times it shall look like the way to freedom is mocked again and again by the misery of a life that is blunt, unwanted, truly empty of all the meaning we’ve always looked for in it and in ourselves. Mocked again, and again, and again – only for our joy and patience, our curiosity and our openness, our commitment and our love to grow stronger, stronger and stronger.

There is such thing as unconditional love; yet we will only know it, when we have done the work of putting ourselves in the other person’s shoes, and have walked long miles and years.

We only truly know trust, when we’ve known distrust. That includes the trust we hold in ourselves.

To live a joyful life is as choice.

To live an unfulfilled, postponed living, is a choice, too.

Life shall always, always, always support us.

No one shall ever be able to take better care of ourselves, than we do.

This day is all we’ve got: treat it with respect.

Hold tight to your dreams, as tight as you hold your dearest of childhood memories.

To shed you shadow, shall prove to be one of the most difficult things you would ever do.

Wait.

Love in a way that allows for the other one’s becoming.

Accept it all.

Give it all.

Show up in your truth.

Stand up tall.

Silently, or not, life will come to its end one day.

Today, is the very first day of the rest of your life.

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About Madalina Serban

I love children. I love the sea. I love dancing. I love writing. And I love a man who makes me laugh.

Discussion

2 thoughts on “Silently, or not

  1. Thank you very much, Madalina, for this beautiful page of writing, so conforting and luminous. Best wishes from Barcelona !

    Posted by Muriel | October 20, 2016, 8:32 AM

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