(October 6th, 2011)
I was about to write about my biking yesterday, about one of the most amazing sunsets I have ever seen, then staying up late at night up in the bamboo tower … I learn about Steve Jobs’s death.
It will still be about a sunset, yet that of life. Rest in peace, Steve. This sunset is yours.
I walk a narrow path through the tall grass bushes, to reach the river. I am alone. My heart is heavy … But I move on, keep going. As I have always done. Some of the questions I cannot answer are still there, brought up again to the surface by a simple comment. And what I miss, is so clear in my mind.
I start see the water, I move on. The land opens, the water is here … plain, almost still, rocks and dark grey sand. I watch the sun in the distance and I hope I will make it back home till it’s not completely dark. Three small children cut grass on the small hill up on my right.
My thoughts fight to get lost within the view over the river, yet they are so strong … I take out my camera; cannot decide which image to capture. But once I start, I lose myself in chasing after the gold reflections of the sun light over the Rapati river. I walk on, don’t realize and don’t care when my feet had made it to the muddy sand, over the slippery stones. Catching the light, it’s all I want. The red, and pink and gold nuances of sky and water, are now all the same.
I have to let it go, eventually: purple red, perfect disk of fire going down behind the green slopes far in the distance. You might as well say the day is over: the sun is down.
Chasing the light. The light within ourselves. Maybe it is like that with what drives us from within as well: there are sunsets, yet there are sunrises again. We walk through sandy, muddy waters so many times along our lives. But if we walk on, confident in our believes and true to our hearts, amaizing reflections of the world within us will be set free. We will be caught in wander.
Trust, Trust the child with yourselves, who can find joy and laughter in any small thing. Who has the eager curiosity of someone who has just walked on into the world. Who knows, instinctively, honesty over lie. Who would not do a thing he would not fully care for. And who would love, unconditionally, and show it, without fear. Live like a child, until the very end of your lives.
You would not be understood at times, but worry not. The ones who would try to bring you down from your dreams up in the sky, would have lost their sense for magic somewhere along they way. Deep down within their hearts, there is child who wished could chase the light with you.